Now I don’t even believe in Hell, but I do find the idea comforting at times.
I like to think there is some sort of divine retribution for those who commit truly heinous acts against their fellowman- or their tastes and sensibilities.
I used to make mental lists of people I wanted to be in First Class on the first intergalactic, passenger carrying, nuclear missle, but I couldn’t think of anyone I hated enough to seat them next to Kathy Lee Gifford. Instead, I’ve gone back to the simple idea that these people will spend eternity burning in hell. Please note: All these people are supposedly still living, therefore there is time for them to atone for their sins.
- The person who invented Crocs.
- Adults who wear Crocs who aren’t gardening or have a medical excuse
- The person who invented paper napkins that dispense like toilet paper on a roll.
- Everyone at Fox News
- George W Bush
- The entire Senior Management Team at USAirways
- Dick Cheney
- The people who started the trend of wearing flip-flops outside one’s own home or at the beach.
- People who wear shorts and/or halter tops- male or female- on airplanes and complain about being cold.
- Sarah Palin
- John Edwards
- The person who invented double-knit polyester pants.
- Pat Robertson-who will meet his friend Jerry Falwell there
- Bob McDonnell, Governor of Virginia
- Ken Cuccinelli, Attorney General of Virginia
- The people who build off site Rental Car Centers that require you to drag your luggage onto a bus to get there
- People who text while driving
- People who talk on their cell phones while driving instead of paying attention to the road and those around them. In other words, most of them…
- Everyone who is cruel to animals
- Phyllis Schlafly and all the men at “Concerned Women for America”
- Ann Coulter
- Those who are so sure they are going to heaven and everyone else is not
- Bobby Brown-for ruining Whitney Houston’s life and career
- Whitney Houston for marrying Bobby Brown and doing that reality show
- Everyone involved with any reality TV series–especially Jon and Kate Goslin, whoever they may be
- Lindsay Lohan– and her Mother and Father
- All people who wear the same clothes to work they would wear to wash the car or mow the grass
- Helicopter Parents
- The TV Executive at CBS who cancelled “Moonlight”
- Everyone involved in financing the Tea Party
- All the Tea Party Candidates
- Bullies
- The person who invented “Great Rooms”
- Bill O’Reilly
- Glenn Beck
- The entire cast of “Jersey Shore”
- Mel Gibson
- The people who set the outrageous rates at “Assisted Living” facilities
- All Politicians who want to cut or privatize Medicare, Veterans Benefits and Social Security
- The person at the Gym who sets the TV over the Trainer’s Desk to Fox News so I’m forced to watch it
- High School Physical Education teachers from the 1970’s
- Bigots
- People who think “facts” are irrelevant
- People who are so Politically Correct they have no sense of humor
- People who still insist the Civil War was about States Rights and not about Slavery
- People who run Insurance Companies
- People who wear Tank Tops
- People who recline their seats on Airplanes taking even more space away from the person behind them
- People who talk during movies, plays or concerts-especially those who talk on their cell phones during outrageously expensive Broadway shows.
- People who speed outrageously, weaving in and out of traffic, so they can get to the stop light 1 second ahead of me
This is a living list….more to come.
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This is a revised repost from my other blog: www.lostinthe21stcentury.com
Bravo on all, but especially no. 29. Are you watching “Hawaii Five-O?” He’s pretty good in it.
I’ve been meaning to check it out, but I can’t keep up with TV schedules anymore. I have to wait for series to come out on DVD…
I think someone’s earned himself a martini.
Thanks, Doug! I wish…now that I have the new Personal Trainer, I can’t eat, much less drink….
I LOVE reading through you blog, Scott!
Also, I despise Ken Cuccinelli…. he makes my BLOOD BOIL.
Thanks, Chelsea!